So instead of writing, I accidentally played video games for 3 months. It's not as if I have writer's block- I have ideas to write about, I'm just really bad at not playing video games.
Anyhoo, my friend Aaron signed a group of us up for a text chat service to help us keep in touch (since we've all moved to different places). It's pretty neat, it's like a text chatroom where we can all contribute. It would have been useful, but I took this as an opportunity to be a dick and immediately starting spamming "CATFACTS" messages to everyone. Here are some of them:
DID YOU KNOW THAT THE OLDEST LIVING CAT IS 31 YEARS OLD?
TO UNSUBSCRIBE REPLY: "ittybittykittytitty"
DID YOU KNOW THAT BOILED CAT MUCUS IS A POWERFUL PARALYTIC THAT WAS USED FREQUENTLY BY FRENCH ASSASSINS IN THE 14TH CENTURY?
TO UNSUB REPLY: "kittysneezes"
DID YOU KNOW CATS ARE IMAGINARY? ALL CATS ARE FABRICATED IN THE MINDS OF THEIR OWNERS- SO CRAZY CAT LADIES ARE APTLY LABELLED.
TO UNSUB REPLY: "catzophrenic"
DID YOU KNOW THAT A CAT HAS FOUR SETS OF EYELIDS? THE INNERMOST CAN BE PULLED OVER THE EYE TO ENABLE THE CAT TO SEE GHOSTS!
TO UNSUB REPLY: "spookitty"
TWO YEARS AGO THIS MONTH, A CAT NAMED BUTTERCUP OF DENVER, CO BECAME THE FIRST EVER TO SEND A TEXT MESSAGE! SHE SENT: "fgghj&*ngh"
TO UNSUB REPLY: "fgghj&*ngh"
He awakens from a postless slumber! As a recipient of these cat messages I must say this is quite a small sample size of the rather extensive cat fact catalog I now possess ;)
ReplyDeleteHow am I NOT currently receiving Pat's Cat Facts?!
ReplyDelete